matureresponsibleadult:

i have a weak spot for men who love their children

(Source: jamiefraser)

kyletravels:

k2e4:

#this is fucked up. this fucked me up

I want to try this

(Source: phrux, via batfag)

  • person: so what music are you into?
  • me: are you sure you're ready for this conversation

thedoctor-hasthe-sorcersstone:

SO TODAY IN CLASS THIS GIRL ASKED
“DO YOU SHIP KIDS?”
AND AFTER EXPLAINING WHAT SHIPPING WAS, THE TEACHER RESPONDED,
“well….yes, we talk about it in the staff room. Who would look cute with who…”
AND THEN WE HAD A FOLLOW UP QUESTION
“does it affect seating?”
“Sometimes,”

(via kaeleykaeleyr5)

The Idiot

mylifeasaserver:

Me: Hi how are you tonight?

Guest: Two.

Me: That’s a strange way to be. I’m feeling rather seven tonight myself.

Guest:

Guest’s girlfriend: *laughs at him*

Me: How many in your party tonight?

Guest’s girlfriend: *whispers something to boyfriend*

Guest: Table for two, please. *hands me a $5 bill*

Me: Right this way.

Hey for a free $5, I’ll quit tormenting him.

Walking into work on a weekend night

lifeofahostess:

"The wait’s how long? That’s ridiculous. Can I speak with a manager? Forget it, we’ll just go somewhere else."

imaperson2:

if it wasn’t for Tamaki we would still be lost souls

aedeagus:

the united states of america is fucking horrific and repulsive and people have every right to shit talk it but leave fat people out of it and stop acting like having fat people makes the usa a bad place, when you could focus on idk literally everything else

(via natasharomnva)

babyhongbin:

babyhongbin:

you may look like a bride but you will never bring your family honor

one day when i try to get a boyfriend this will come back to bite me

(Source: cantaloupemilk, via affectionisneverwasted)

Doing my hair & make-up

jessidork:

thranduil-stormborn:

xeduo:

queenwinterborn:

Expectation: 

image

Reality:

image

steve rogers loves you either way

image

this is an important message which i want to share with all of you

(via affectionisneverwasted)

(Source: kazrawiii, via foodmusicboys)